"Daughter, You Are..." - Things Every Mother Should Tell Her Daughter

"A daughter is a miracle that never ceases to be miraculous... full of beauty and forever beautiful... loving and caring and truly amazing."- Deanna Beisser

When my daughter was born, and placed into my arms I cried. Tears of happiness, and fear. I knew this little girl would forever hold my heart, and I became afraid of all the things she would one day face. I made a vow to her that very moment, that she would be stronger than I ever was, because I would make it so.

I always say I am a different kind of parent. The way I interact with my children is different than anyone I have ever met. I'm more realistic, and less fluffy bunnies.

We live in a society where children are teased, and bullied mercilessly. Young girls have it especially hard. They are expected to fit into a certain mold of beauty, thrust on us by media propaganda. They are shown images of super skinny females, and told that is beauty. They are shown females that have faces caked with make-up, and told if they don't fit the mold, to make themselves fit. 

It's all bullshit!

It's the fastest, and easiest way to destroy a young girls self esteem. As a mother, I refuse to allow my daughter to put such an emphasis on trivial things, like external beauty. Not because my child is not beautiful... she is... but because I know there are more important things about a person. Beauty is a superficiality to me. 

I began wondering recently how different girls would be if we put less importance in the physical appearance. What if we began giving our daughters compliments, and encouragements else where? Not to say that you shouldn't tell her she is beautiful. You should, and often. But perhaps not as often as other things. 

What if we make an effort to give our daughter reminders of everything they could, and should be? What if we compliment them on their character? What if we make it so that they aren't just a Princess? Because they can be so much more than that. More than just a Princess. More than a damsel in distress. More than a female defined by her male counterparts. More than a female defined by anyone else, period! What if we start by saying… 

Daughter, You Are

- Intelligent

- Kind
- Brave

- Compassionate

- Considerate

- Courageous

- Strong
- Determined
- Focused 

- Creative

- Funny

- Loving

- Adventurous
- A Warrior 
- Resourceful 
-Generous 

Daughter, You Should

- Be polite, and well mannered

- Treat others with dignity, and respect

- Practice forgiveness

- Read, write, and draw… often
- Play a sport... Play several
- Learn an instrument

- Help those less fortunate than you

- Love those who love you

- Ignore those who don't

- Speak your mind

- Use kind words

- Laugh... often

- Face your fears

- Travel the world

- Take photos to preserve memories

- Love deeply... starting with yourself

Daughter, You Should Not

- Change to fit someone else's ideal

- Judge someone before knowing them

- Concern yourself with negative people

- Allow anyone, friends and family alike, to make you feel small

Daughter, Remember That

- You must grow up, you choose to grow old

- Beauty fades with time

- Your character, above all else, defines you

- You can achieve anything, so long as you work for it... luck is a farce 

Daughter, You Are and Always Will Be

- Exceptional

- Phenomenal

- Irreplaceable 

- Incredible 

- Loved unconditionally  

Most importantly, how other people treat, and view you is a reflection of them, not you. 

The words we speak have power. The words we speak to our young girls should be chosen carefully, and should be powerful is a positive way. Think before you speak. That young lady will be an adult woman one day. What you have said to her will live inside her heart forever.